JET Programme Series: Trinbagonian & Japanese Love - Knikkoliev Seebaran

I have been living in japan for about 2 years and being here has brought me new experiences, and taught me many lessons about life. Recently, I was blessed with a new outlook on life. So I want to take a moment and give a quick overview about my love life in Japan.

If I am honest, I would say it has been challenging, but I have finally reached a point where things are progressing in a more positive light. Let me give you a quick summary about the life of a foreigner being in love with a Japanese person.

Dating: Dating in another country can be difficult, especially if you have a limited grasp of the language. After living in Japan for about 2 years, I found myself looking for companionship. Over time, I eventually learned to understand the cultural behaviour of the Japan’s lifestyle and I have concluded that, confidence is important. I learned how to respectfully speak to Japanese women while making it easy for them to talk to me. And this is how I met my wife. By being open and honest to her about finding someone to enjoy the rest of my life with, she immediately agreed to date me and things escalated quickly. Being over 30 years old, we concluded that we have done everything we ever wanted to do in our young life and our last dream was to settle down and have a family. So we did not waste time.

Marriage: My marriage was on Christmas day 2019. This happened because we had a lot of issues in finding time to finalize all our documentation. Since Japan doesn’t have a Trinidad and Tobago Embassy, I had to get all my documents to and from Trinidad, directly. But my mom always told me, “everything happens for a reason”. Now my anniversary IS on Christmas day and I think that is a much more special (and easier to remember) day.

Marriage and Language: I am married to a Japanese woman. It’s very interesting to say but even more interesting to experience. My Japanese level isn’t as great as most people would think but I was lucky to find a very intelligent and beautiful Japanese woman who is willing to “put up” with my faults and silliness. I think her English ability is very good because I can have a fairly good conversation with her and she knows the right words to make me laugh. Most people told me that my Japanese skill will improve because now I have a Japanese wife but I don’t think it’s fair to her to be my wife and my teacher. I am on my own path in learning Japanese so whenever I go home to her, I want to go home to my wife. She appreciates my decision but she always finds ways to test my Japanese ability.

Baby: Having a baby is a truly unique experience. This year, my wife and I had a baby girl. Before she was born, I had a huge fear about her being treated differently, being a half Trinbagonian and half Japanese. There’s a lot of speculation about the mistreatment of “half-fu” in Japan. But after spending so much time, sharing my culture with my fellow co-workers and neighbours, I realized that things will be ok. Learning about Japan’s culture from my co-workers has shown me that Japanese people in the country side just need to be educated about other cultures for them to be comfortable around other kinds of people.

This new life that I have decided to embark on, has become one of the most enjoyable experiences so far and I look forward to new challenges and surprises every day. I’m very thankful for all the opportunities that the JET programme has offered and to all the people who have helped me to get to this point in my life.

Knikkoliev Seebaran
JET (Japanese Exchange & Teaching) Program Assistant Langauge Teacher
Imabari City, Aichi Preficture, JAPAN

JET Series: Trinbagonian & Japanese Love (Japanese Embassy's Facebook ) 
Trinidadian on JET programme finds love in Japan (LOOP News T&T) 



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